Disrupt

Disrupts are moments in life when we feel distracted and are forced to stop our regular flow of creativity. It can be a time when we feel like giving up, but we musn’t. I like what Randy Pausch said: “The walla aren’t in our path to stop us but rather to test how much we want it. Huge numbers may want something but you determine how much more you want it than anyone else. A disruption is usually temporary it depends on you. Here’s Randy:

Frigid

Frigid is a word to describe the girl in high school who won’t have sex with you. She always has other plans like her future, college, volunteering, a job. You might use the word to describe a wife that is never interested in sex. I don’t recall ever hearing this word used to describe men. I’m not sure why that is. Plenty of men don’t want to have sex. I’m not sure what you would describe them as.

As a closing thought, isn’t it strange how the frigid girls and wives usually end up the most successful? Maybe we put too much emphasis on sex.

Rumor that Makes Her Churn

Name that movie!

Churn is what you do when you know the whole school has an idea about you that is false. You also know something you said as a white lie in confidence to a friend got “leaked” and the rumor mill ran with it. You know as a rational person it will fade and the rumor will be fixed but for now, everywhere you walk on campus you think people are saying to themselves, “There’s that floozy.” What’s more, you’re still a virgin.

Toxic

Toxic thinking can be when you dwell on things you have no control over for too long and perhaps too many times a day.

The trouble is that being responsible sometimes require you to have these thoughts so you can solve your problems. You can’t just become a complete hippie, ignoring these thoughts. To an extent they must be dealt with. For me the toxic point is when it starts to bring your mood down because that really doesn’t need to happen. Do the best you can and let the rest come what may.

Toxic also means deadly and I believe negative thoughts can kill us slowly, even quickly if allowed to grow ad thrive without check. Love the ones around you, whoever they may be because families take care of their own. One way to prevent thought toxicity is to love and empower those around you. For me that means my wife and kids, as well as some close friends. Learn what the things are that give you pleasure and happiness and do them. This also is an antidote for thought toxicity. Take on things that are solutions and that don’t contribute to the toxic stuff. Slowly, you’ll find you have ways to combat it.

We all have fears, not all of us are willing to take steps to conquer them.

*Warning* Don’t be a Debbie Downer

Warning is what you get when all things are safe. Most times in life, there is not one. If someone’s car hits you from behind, there is not warning for example. When there is one, you should pay attention to it. If you know you have no income but money in the bank, there is a warning every time that balance goes down. If you’re holding out for that big amazing paying job, perhaps you should think about the warning. Something is better than nothing.

One reason we don’t pay attention to warnings so much is because we don’t know the consequences. Obviously if you go into deep space without a space suit you will implode and die. Most things aren’t that obvious. Warnings without knowledge of consequences are useless I think. A flashing red light only bothers us when we have felt the aftermath. How about these people who are always warning everyone, the “Debbie Downers” of the earth.

These people are sometimes helpful but never let them know that or they’ll never shut up. I have a few of these people in my world and they are inconsolable. While the character is larger than life, I think she makes people laugh because everyone has one of these in their circle. Pay attention to your own warnings and don’t give so much advice, don’t be a Debbie Downer.

Another Way of Looking at It

You can’t keep what once was, but you can smile because it happened. (borrowed heavily from Dr. Seuss) Be comfortable with the flow of change, the permanence of change. Be elated at times as you travel that lonesome highway. Don’t think about the betrayals, relish the companions. That’s your deal man, the last fair deal going down. Betrayed people are also welcome to have this notion.