Salesman at my Door: Kirby Alert!

This post was originally posted 12/15/07
This afternoon about 3:45pm I got a knock on my door by a twenty-something male claiming to be from a new carpet cleaning place in Hesperia (a local city) and that to show what his company can do he wanted to clean our carpet for free.

Immediately I felt the urge to decline because frankly, I didn’t want to move my butt off my couch: I’m on Christmas break! Still, I conferred with my wife since I know she always enjoys having the carpets cleaned. She gave me the thumbs up so we arranged for him to come back in between 5 and 6. We scurried to move the sofas out of the room until he arrived, at 6:05!

What followed gave me that sinking feeling where you go: “Ahhhhhhhh I get this now … it’s a sales pitch.” Now instead of one guy, there were three and we realized we’d been suckered into having three fast talking, fast moving Kirby vacuum salesmen in our family room … What a drag!

I watched him do his little routine showing us the dirt that his device collected and then stopped him abruptly. Having a background in sales, I know that every house is just a lead and the more time you spend on a dead lead … well, I told him we weren’t gonna buy. He persisted stating that all he wanted to do was clean my carpet. My wife asked me to back off, so I did. I went and got pizza while he “did his job” of cleaning my carpet. Later I clarified to my all-too-trusting wife that his job clearly was not to “clean our carpet” but rather to sell vacuums.

About three awkward hours since they first darkened my doorway, we have clean, but cold and wet carpet. The salesman earned nothing for his efforts and all I regret is not stopping it all before it started. After all, we just bought a brand new steam cleaner and vacuum for our home. My wife says: “Live and learn.” What she doesn’t know is that I’ve already lived and learned this lesson through experience in sales. My live and learn takeaway was: “Tell your wife what’s up when salesman come a callin’! And when you do, stand your ground.”

Trivia: The average price of a Kirby vacuum is $1500.

Author: Damien Riley

I'm an online diarist, blog film critic, & podcaster. My views on films and life are often 'left of center' on, but I have respect for other viewpoints. I married my high-desert princess (now my queen). We have 3 children.

4 thoughts on “Salesman at my Door: Kirby Alert!”

  1. I’m amazed that they continued to keep cleaning the carpeting even though you insisted you weren’t going to buy the machine! I say, if that’s what they want to do, even though you made yourself clear, well that’s their problem.

    Once I called one of those come to your house with carpet samples companies. They guy brought like 3 books of samples, but nothing that I wanted. I told him I wanted a chocolate color in my living room and a darker blue in my son’s room. He didn’t have either of those colors. How can they not have a dark brown and a dark blue?

    I was polite and thanked him for coming over. This guy would not leave. He wanted me to consider using different colors (the ones he had in his books) and said "If I leave, I’m not going to make a sale."

    I told him he’s not going to make a sale even if he stays, so he might as well go. He wouldn’t budge. Finally, the hubby threatened to call the police and he left.

    I don’t ever let any kind of salesperson in my house after that. If I want something, I’ll go to the store and buy it.

  2. Yeah, we are like that too.  I think most people wouldn’t let them in if they were saying they were trying to sell vacuums … especially if they have brand new vacuums!  The way they got in was deceptive.  maybe someone reading this will benefit from our experience!

  3. HA HA! I’m in tears of laughter. I only found this researching keyword related blogs for carpets. I am that salesman in the last post that travelled 10 miles through heavy traffic only to find somebody who thought nothing of keeping me from my tea (probably pizza) for a couple of hours on a mere whim of boredom sometime earlier in their day (don’t experienced salesmen just know when the caller hasn’t got any money).

    Did you hear the true story of the UK vacuum salesman that knocked on a cottage door, brazenly emptied a small bag of dust and grit on the old lady’s floor and proclaimed "If my vacuum can’t pick that up in seconds I’ll eat every bit of it myself". The old lady went inside the house and reappeared with a spoon saying "we haven’t got electricity"
    Life is a scream eh folks!!!

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